Lesson 139
I will accept Atonement for myself.
We follow-up yesterday’s lesson as we continue our discussion on the power of choice, recognizing in any moment we come to two distinct choices that eventually lead us to the single choice for the acceptance of the Atonement. There is no gray area and there is second-guessing. To find one’s self in a murky and confused place is to still be uncertain and to still side with idea that there must be an opposite to Love, which there is not, but we continue to believe it is so. We create further precision with our discernment as we come to find that there can be no uncertainty in certainty. Any little bit of doubt we harness, like the little pinky left out of heaven, is not assurance at all.
“It is so far beyond all doubt and question that to ask it what it must be is all the proof you need to show that you believe the contradiction that you know not what you cannot fail to know” (ACIM Lesson 139 8:3).
We have tried on many roles from victim to bully to savior but often the one role we overlook is that of the “not knower.” That mask we put on which makes us feel paralyzed in confusion and uncertainty. That part of us that didn’t seem like a “role” we played because it served as a trait that led us to teachings like A Course in Miracles. The one who knew that there was something more but was just not sure what. Yet to come fully naked before God, all roles, including the ones that served the Atonement, must be released as well. Today we come fully to know, with certainty, that the Union we have been searching for is waiting but for our acceptance as we release the “un” in uncertainty.
A statement like, “I accept Atonement for myself,” can be an easy one on certain levels because it truly comes down to the simplicity of welcoming what already Is, that you are a Child of God and that you need to nothing but live from that acceptance. Yet where the rubber meets the road is how slyly we put on the hat of the one who does not know.
“He merely states that he is not himself, and therefore, being something else, becomes a questioner of what that something is. Yet he could never be alive at all unless he knew the answer” (ACIM Lesson 139 4:1-2).
Uncertainty can be just like all of the other safety blankets that we have let go of to this point. We do not realize that we have come to be seen to those around us as “that person who does not know:” the person who doesn’t know where to live or what to buy at the store or which shirt to wear or which job she wants or what to study, etc. Do you recognize how often throughout the day you ask for confirmation from someone else? Do you realize how often throughout the day you sit in uncertainty, self-doubt, or second-guessing? These are the small ways in which we come to believe there are instances we must not be connected to our safe, loving Union with God.
Yes, today is about claiming the choiceless choice; the choice for love; the choice to remember; the choice for Union. However it is about how this choice is subtly laced throughout our day from the grocery store to our acts of service. This weave of tapestry is how we live the remembrance. It is how we serve as an example to our brothers and sisters. It is how we put down the final role, the seeker.
The subject of acceptance is also about correcting our misguided thinking by creating a new habit. Being uncertain and seeking for answers outside ourselves has become a comfortable blanket, while the opposite, the truth, has become what we considered to be uncomfortable, making even the most certain of choices, uncertain. Once we begin to let go of all of our questioning and second-guessing, and begin claiming who and what, it can feel awkward. That does not make it not peaceful. We stated before that in choosing for God there is feeling of expansion that pervades the body and in choosing for ego there is contraction. As we shift to choosing for Love, for certainty, it can feel awkward but that is it, just awkward. It is a shift in the momentum of your energy, that is all. It may feel the opposite of peaceful but truly if you give it a few breaths it will pass. Think of it this way, contraction does not pass when you reflect on a choice but awkwardness, indeed, eases.
The Course is bold in its statement today that we choose to stay in our uncertainty because we are not ready to be certain. This may sting but there is truth in this. We have to ask ourselves what we are getting out of playing the role of the “not knower?” As stated above, we may be getting attention from others. We may believe that if we didn’t know and didn’t ask for people to “save us” that we would remain unseen in the world and no one would have a reason to talk to us. We may also believe that to fully know the presence of God within us and to live that way, means that we will end up living a boring life. This leads to the question, are we addicted to the drama of being the “not knower?” Gaining the world’s attention in this manner can be just like the hit of a good drug. Are you ready to let this go?
“If he asks as if he does not know, it merely shows he doe not want to be the thing he is” (ACIM Lesson 139 4:3).
These are tough questions to look at because it is putting a mirror up to our own faces and recognizing that no one has been standing between God and us except ourselves. But isn’t this a relief as we do not wait on another or any special thing to release us? It is truly up to our own readiness. We are perfectly fine to keep choosing drama and searching question after question. There is no harm. Yet, if we are ready to put down the game, which if you are reading this mostly likely you are, it truly comes down to a simple choice.
“Atonement remedies the strange idea that it is possible to doubt yourself, and be unsure of what you really are” (ACIM Lesson 139 6:1).
Our practice periods offer us the time to fully feel our inheritance and to feel what it is like to sit as Christ, to truly claim that we are the Sons and Daughters of God. It is like staring in a mirror and repeating powerful affirmations such as,
I am a knowing and capable woman.
I am an honorable man who chooses wisely in each moment.
I am strong and inspiring.
I surround myself with loving and kind people.
I am as God created me.
I am the Light of the World.
Our practice periods are also like taking a pilgrimage and getting in touch that part of us that is so real and so knowing that nothing could ever shake us. As we practice our acceptance throughout the day, I invite you to notice where you seem to second-guess yourself or where you feel the need for confirmation. Love those moments and begin to choose differently. Begin to step into your knowing. Do something different and know that you know! Yes, it may feel awkward but I promise it will ease.
“You are yourself. There is no doubt of this” (ACIM Lesson 139 5:5-6).
If you want further exposure to today’s lesson, take yourself out to dinner and gaze at the menu and feel the certainty as you select your entrée. Or take yourself out for the day and live in the certainty of your choices as you ask yourself, right or left? Up or down? Hungry or not hungry? Movie or museum? Feel the response of certainty that you get and exercise it as you would with any other muscle in your body.
Exercise your knowing, your radiance, and your Inner Guidance. It is all up to you, and what you do for you, you do for us all. As you strengthen your knowing, the world strengthens as well. Enjoy the power that comes with the one choice, the acceptance of your Atonement. Namaste.